Perfect Imperfections

“Who, being loved, is poor?” – Oscar Wilde

I, for one, believe that I am not! 😇

It’s March, my favourite month of the year. As a young and newlywed woman, who’s irrevocably in love, and who has just experienced a whole new world of emotions and thoughts, what else could I write about other than the wonderful, terrifying, astounding, riotous, perplexing, inspiring, joyous topic of love and marriage?

I’ve got to admit that I’ve always been a sappy and hopeless romantic inside my guarded exterior; someone who not only expects a lot of love and care but also considers it her birthright. Despite this, I wasn’t really, consciously, waiting for a Prince Charming to whisk me off my feet. My father set the bar very high for the men in my life and therefore I had, unknowingly, become a bit selective about finding or choosing that one man I would fall in love with and marry. I did not have a checklist to tick off; I find that rather stupid, but I was sure, from time immemorial, that I would always, always marry for LOVE.

And I did! 🤘

I met this perfect gentleman during my schooldays. Contrary to popular belief, we are not ‘high school- sweethearts’. (How I wish I could go back in time and hit my tubelight of a husband, real bad!👊) We were just two friends who were in touch, on and off. But the universe had different plans; its coincidences and serendipities turned our lives around. What started as a friendship quickly blossomed into love and before we knew it, we were thinking about a life together.

Now, being a human being and trying to relate to another human being in a loving relationship is challenging no matter how well-matched the couple may be and, believe it or not, every couple encounters problems. We, too, had our own share of hiccups and hurdles because we come from different cultural backgrounds.

Star-crossed lovers, indeed! 🙅‍♀️

However, we, both, knew that our love was not just a fleeting emotion, it was a skill that required an immense amount of patience, understanding, tolerance, generosity, and more than anything courage and belief – a belief that no matter how silly a thing love is, it’ll help us fight against all the boundaries society has created and in the end, if things are meant to be, no force in the universe will be strong enough to keep us apart.

A wise man once said,

“There is no force equal to that of a determined woman.”

I, for one, never gave up and nor did this gentleman in question. We just believed, and with our ceaseless dedication, waited patiently. Eventually, everything fell into place and we got what our heart desired. Our love prevailed and how! I, also, got to fulfil all my wishes for our wedding – right from planning the details of the wedding invite, selecting mehendi designs for myself and my girl gang, deciding the playlist for the sangeet to setting up a number with bae and much more. I, even, had my filmy ‘serving chai to the in-laws’ moment! In fact, one of my fondest memories is when our parents met for the first time and, despite the cultural differences, got along as if they had known each other for years. *Touchwood*

You see, the reason why March is my favourite month is because this month, last year, marked the beginning of a very different kind of living arrangement between two people who had been living quite happily and singly for about 28 years. In simple words, we got married in March, last year. The wedding ceremonies lasted, almost, a week. The culturally diverse rituals and traditions only brought our families closer thereby helping us enjoy the best of both worlds. What a celebration it was! 😍

Now some people may think that – “Of course, she has all the merry things to share about love and marriage; she’s been married only for a year; what would she know about the long haul?” Well, hold your horses, folks! I know how the reality of the less romantic mundane aspects of life together sets in soon after the wedding celebrations are over; how the initial ecstasy of being sure “this is it” slowly settles into becoming a fact about your life. Having said that, we, both, are still peeling off different layers in which our marriage is so beautifully enveloped. It’s crazy how you can be sure about one thing and completely unsure about the other.

Despite having grown up with two sets of parents who loved each other – however imperfectly – and seeing couples in our social circles navigating through married life, we still had no idea what our own married life had in store for us. We were never taught that love grows in the disappointing and the mundane moments of our day to day life just as much as it grows in the romantic, playful and joy-filled times. Only through the first-hand experience, did we learn how love deepens and stumbles, survives and evolves over time. And that, my friends, was the best part – the time when we discovered that we don’t, constantly, have to be lovestruck. It might sound very ironic coming from a hopeless romantic like me, but love, no matter how great, cannot be a constant thing of amusement. You should, in fact, consider yourselves lucky if you’ve understood and accepted this teeny tiny fact of life.

Thankfully, my husband and I were not in any kind of bubble when we got married and are quite attuned to the realities of life. While we love spending time with each other, we both lead our own individual lives too. It’s funny how even the separateness keeps us together. So, does that mean the romance has, already, fizzled out? NO! It has, in fact, become stronger than ever.

We try to capture happiness in the small and nameless moments, throughout the day and we do so in our own unique ways. Although we are complete opposites, we are a lot alike, too – in the sense we have the same values about life, in general. We can comfortably sit in silence, together but also talk for hours. We revel in roaming around the world as well as laying in bed and staring at the ceiling for hours. We are, both, a little crazy but we balance each other out and that has become our best asset. All our decisions are made together (except, maybe, while watching Netflix- we mostly end up watching what I decide). We don’t usually arrive at these decisions quickly – there is, sometimes, a healthy clash of opinions, but in the end, we figure out a way and save the day. 😎

Another wise man once said,

“…A marriage made in heaven is one where a man and a woman become more richly themselves together than the chances are either of them could ever have managed to become alone.”

Our marriage continues to be a beautiful risk of the heart made with complete confidence in one another. With every passing day, we are learning to appreciate each other’s individuality, flaws, and imperfections as they are every bit a part of the wonderful person we fell in love with and married. Of course, we are not perfect. In fact, I believe, we’re like the imperfect pieces of a puzzle that just fit together… perfectly.

Now isn’t that what it’s all about? To live a good life with someone imperfectly perfect and still believe that the best days of your life are yet to come! ❤️

To everyone reading this, I hope you find LOVE – a love that blinds you in such a way, it makes you see things more clearly; a love so whimsical that it tickles your funny bone, and a love so intense that it leaves a mark on your soul. 🤞

Published by Devyani

Hello there, and welcome to my little corner of the internet. If you are going to read further – thank you, in advance! My name is Devyani, and I’m not your average scribbler but a professional writer, editor, and digital marketer with a knack for crafting easily digestible content and strategy - basically a conduit between the brand and consumer. I am someone who weaves her words with emotions. I find writing very therapeutic. A big fan of unconventional love stories; I love telling them and hate being restricted. I am a believer, with an attention span of a toddler; found to be the happiest in the company of children and dogs. I started this blog with a goal to create a space where I can post whatever, accurately, reflects what’s in my heart and on my mind. I want to share my personal experiences and interact with those going through similar situations. I, also, plan to use my blog to document my personal and professional growth, share my personal style, travel vlogs, and give tips on, almost, everything under the sun. I hope you enjoy reading this blog as much as I enjoy creating it! Read on! 😊

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